At a dinner party last night, I was thrilled to find out that one of my fellow guests was a pilot who'd once worked for a major commercial airline. Naturally, I couldn't resist grilling her (career day style!), and the insider info she had on airline travel was pretty fascinating. Ever wonder what the pilot knows that you don't? Read on.

1. The plane isn't going to crash-land if you accidentally leave your cell phone on.
So why do flight attendants tell you to turn all electronic devices off? Well, the cell phone signals could, in theory, interfere with the plane's satellite navigation instruments---but the truth is they're so well insulated that it won't actually happen. (That's not to say you shouldn't make a habit of doing it anyway---just to be safe.)

2. Pilots can't take bathroom breaks.
You might never have considered it,. but what happens if the captain has to pee? Well, it's an arduous process. A pilot who needs to make a visit to the, uh, facilities must first alert the flight attendant, who has to block the galley with her cart. While the pilot is out of the cockpit, the flight attendant must take his place, waiting until he comes back to switch out. Warning for future pilots everywhere? Don't overdose on the iced tea. "When you have to go, it can be kind of a pain," admits my pilot. "The flight attendants might be busy serving dinner or the drink service, and then you have to wait and wait."

Photo courtesy of IgoUgo member John Spreitz

3. Getting upgraded is a delicate art.
The best tool in your arsenal? A heavy stock of Frequent Flier miles, says my pilot, which--beyond their obvious function of being traded in for a better seat---show the airline you're loyal (and therefore worth keeping sweet.) Beyond that? "Be nice to the gate agent. And the key in any situation where you're interacting with airline staff is not to get angry. Keep your cool."

4. Don't drink the water.
There isn't one drop of (unbottled) water on the entire plane, says my pilot, that would pass a human safety test. Solution? By all means hydrate, but stick to bottled water only and never sip the H20 in the bathrooms. As for tea and coffee? Chances are they might have been made with bottled water too, but always ask. (If not, your best bet is to pass.)

5. The dirtiest place in the world is the airplane bathroom---but the cabin isn't much better either.
Contrary to popular belief, says my pilot, the air inside an airplane cabin isn't actually recycled---well, 20% of it is, but the other 80% is the plain old fresh stuff, brought on in air scoops as the plane moves forward. So you can stop blaming the "stale air" for getting sick. The far more likely culprit? Germs.

While ground staff might come on board to remove trash and put magazines back in seat pockets, a plane, you see, isn't actually cleaned cleaned until it's rehabbed---roughly once a year. So while you might like to believe that the cabin is disinfected between every flight, "no soapy sponge or vacuum ever touches the interior," says my pilot. Her advice? Wash your hands, wash your hands, and then wash your hands again---preferably with an anti-bacterial soap you bring on yourself (you can find them in travel-sized bottles.) Better yet, bring your own anti-bacterial wipes onto the flight as well, and give your arm rest and tray table their own going-over. (And as for those airline pillows and blankets? "Oh, don't even touch them," groans my pilot.)

A last little secret? Take heart in the fact that the cockpit isn't exactly sparkling either---most pilots don't think twice about some on-the-job snacking. "The controls and floor of the cockpit," says my pilot, "are covered in the crushed remains of every peanut that ever accidentally fell."